Jankies! We’ve Solved The Case Of The Stolen Bases
In 1972, a young Polish man by the name of Stanley "Stash" Petrosky burst on the scene with the Pirates organization and stole 87 bases while pinch-running for the Single-A Long John Silvers. No...
View ArticleDraftKings: Discounted Zack and a Coors Stack
Last week I laid out some Men In Black references for you fine readers. Always one to double down whenever possible, this week, we need to break out our neuralyzers and forget all about Zack Greinke’s...
View ArticleRoyals Hustled By Minnedozier Bats
Holy shizzballs. That's not the Urban Dictionary definition of shizzballs either, which is when you shizz your grapes. That's shizzballs as in this is the greatest display of sexiness since a young...
View ArticleBaseman Turner Overdrive Is Takin’ Care Of Business
I blame Jonathan Villar, Dusty, Francisco Lindor and Rougned Odor, in no particular order. Those players and Dusty are the reason why I owned Trea Turner and dropped him. I mean, no one would be...
View ArticleWith Reyes, The Cards At Least Hold An Ace-High In Their Hands
This offseason I'm going to recap sixteen-after-twenty, then I'll go over the best rookies for next year, then I'll go into sleepers and, finally, the new rankings. Holy crap! We're already at the...
View ArticleCouch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft Recap, Rounds 1-6
Greetings, friends. I hopped over to the football side of things once last year's baseball season ended, but now I'm back. And apparently, I am such a disturbed individual that I am doing fantasy...
View ArticleTop 80 Outfielders for 2017 Fantasy Baseball
As we continue our 2017 fantasy baseball rankings, we head into the homestretch of ranking hitters. For those confused, homestretch isn't when you shoot up late at night, remembering there's a Dorito...
View ArticleCouch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft Recap, Rounds 13-18
Here we are, the third of four posts about the Couch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft. Previously, I posted recaps of rounds 1-6 and rounds 7-12. This post is for rounds 13-18. The final post will be...
View ArticlePoints Leagues: Reflecting On My Projecting
As I begin to prepare my projections and rankings for the 2017 season, I like to look back on the previous season's attempt to not only assess my work, but also to learn how I can do better next time....
View ArticleLeague of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Draft Recap
Before we jump right into this draft recap, let’s go over a little bit of background about the league and its details. This isn’t like the typical RCL 5x5 rotisserie league we often talk about in this...
View ArticleSale + Jameson’s In Boston Leads To Bad Things
Somewhere, Melissa Leo is acting out today's title and it's so spot on you're not sure if you should applaud, or put your wallet in the front pocket. "I came straight from the packie because I heard...
View ArticleBiking Bumgarner Bail Out a Big Bummer
There's no denying that Madison Bumgarner works hard. Well, he plays even harder. So it should have come as no surprise when news broke that the San Francisco ace was placed on the disabled list after...
View ArticleFantasyDraft: Sooner or Latos, He’s Gonna Get Hit
Mat Latos has been on six different teams since 2015, DFA’d three times and some how is still pitching in the big leagues. He's actually been pitching pretty well in his couple starts this season,...
View ArticleLost Boy Corey Failed, Man!
Corey Kluber left yesterday's game with lower back discomfort, before giving up five earned in three innings to the Tigers. In every game, the Tigers look like John Jaso, just dreadful. I mean, you...
View ArticleSAGNOF Report: One Month Down, Steals On An Uptick
When I say uptick, I mean that with the slightest bit of tick that any tick can offer. But any positive in a stat that was headed for the extinct list like that Rhino on Tinder is a fantastic thing....
View ArticleFantasyDraft: I Don’t Think You’re Ready For This, Eddie
Aloha from Clearwater Beach, Florida. I will be relaxing at the beach in this 90-degree weather today. I promise, I’m not trying to rub it in. The weather is starting to warm up as we approach summer,...
View ArticleThings Looking Sonny For Bizarro Grey Albright
Okay, this is weird, but Sonny Gray and I are complete opposites. Sonny Gray is in Bay Area, and it's Grey Albright in Los Angeles. Weather you like it or not, that's weird! Pun noted too! Grey...
View ArticleAmbulance Chasers, Week 9: Fishing For Trout Replacements
If you had to write a fill-in-the-blank to summarize fantasy baseball in 2016, it would look something like this: “________ hit 30 HRs in 2016, a career high. He will hit half that amount in 2017.”...
View ArticleVolquez No Hits DBacks, Roto Points>Scrabble Points!
Sometimes, baseball can be that game we all fell in love with *covers mouth so you can't hear number* years ago. Whether it's Paul O'Neil hitting a triple with an error to score a home run for a child...
View ArticleScooter Drives Ya, Ma, Motherf**kin’ Ha Out Of The Park
Scooter Gennett had the game of his life yesterday. Well, isn't he Vespecial? You say to me, "Unkie Grey, can I sit on your lap metaphorically and you tell me why Scooter hit so many homers?" Sure,...
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